Catching my breath
I know, it has been a while since my last post … I hope you are doing well and that you sticked around, despite my absence.
Have you ever had that feeling of being so late while working on a project that the more time went by, the more anxious you became ? This is exactly what happened with the blog lately. I honestly felt like writing, but the more I waited, the worse it became. I have to admit that I have been looking at the blog’s icon several times and deliberately avoided it. I found myself excuses and felt more guilty everyday. Guilty for not writing articles. Not answering comments. Not even reading over people’s blog. It became a vicious circle …
To be honest, the current situation is not helping. We have been spending more than a year at home. Our third lockdown is endless (Ireland has been on level 5 since January 1st). I am trying to keep a good mindset as much as I can, but I am starting to feel drained. I have no more energy left after work. There is the uncertainty of the situation, the feeling that we will never see the end of the tunnel, the impatience and the irritation of not seing things moving faster … On top of all that, there is still the everyday hassles (work, health, family, house …). Because you know, these little things do not take breaks, even with covid.
Overall, I also think that society is asking a lot from us. On every level. In the past few weeks, I felt so tired and overwhelmed by what is happening online. So I took a break from social medias as well. We don’t often talk about it, but even online, there is a pressure to be perfect. We need to be irreproachable. Bloggers have to post regularly, be interesting and inspiring, stay positive, be consistant. I clearly felt drowned and not good enough.
In the last couple of weeks, I felt like I needed a break. I focused on what mattered most. I gathered all my strengths to get out of a situation that was becoming unbearable. It has been exhausting. There have been a lot of anxiety, questions and apprehension. But in the end, it brought good news. The kind that lifts a huge weight out of your chest. And I breathed again.
So here I am again, a lot lighter and full of optimism. Breathing in and out, for a fresh start.